Luke's strange career

Dying insects and animals seem to throw themselves at the small city plot that is our home and yard. They seem magnetically attracted to....my youngest son. They must know that he will tenderly care for them until they die and then give them a funeral worthy of anything at Arlington. He's provided hospice care for a snake, a grasshopper, and most recently, a three-legged lizard. When this lizard passed away, my son took half a day preparing for the funeral and then very soberly called Noah and me to assemble for the ceremony.

I don't know where he got all the information on funeral protocol, but he must have paid close attention to it. I was trying SO hard not to giggle--really wanted to respect the deceased--but it was just impossible. He began with a (toy) gun salute (thank goodness he didn't know there were supposed to be 21) and I had to hide my smile. He called to our attention the lizard's loyal companionship in his last 24 hours and his tender last moments. Luke dubbed him, "Luke the Lazy" ("LAZY?!" I shrieked, with tears of hysterical laughter now running down my face, "He was LAME!"). He shrugged off my disruption and continued with his eulogy, bemoaning this life lost too soon. He sweetly placed the shoebox in the grave and invited us to shovel dirt on top of it. He asked me, the prayer mom, to say the final prayer. Oh Lord forgive me for praying a thinking-of-how-it-would-play-on-a-sitcom prayer rather than seriously blessing this young reptile's life and asking Your comfort for his family. It gets more hilarious. The day after this lizard was laid to his eternal rest, Luke felt the need to relocate his grave. He prepared a new, better place in our front yard and then exhumed and moved the body. Of course, ceremony now demanded a new memorial service. This time a headstone was added and a cross erected. Luke the Lazy would have been so humbled that his life has been so honored. Me? I am a little nervous as to what's going to crawl, fly, or slither its ebbing body onto this half-acre next....but I know one thing--I better keep that black dress at the ready.